Tomorrow is Yorkshire day: an occasion where the entire nation (or, at least, a significant Northern chunk of it) gather to celebrate all the things we love about God’s own country.
In honour of this esteemed event, we’ve put together a list of some of the most Yorkshire things that have ever happened. So sit back with your cup of (Yorkshire) tea and get ready to read some of the most fittingly funny stories the county has ever produced.
A man sold his wife… for beer
In 1862, after a few unsuccessful attempts, a man from Selby succeeded in selling his wife for a pint of beer.
Apparently prices had dropped, as a few years earlier a man from Sheffield did the same, on the church steps, for a quart of beer. Incredible. Well, I say that, but any Yorkshire bloke will know a man who wouldn’t look out of place trying to sell his wife.
“Arthur, tek thi booits off, tha getting mud all over carpit”
“SOLD! Tu bloke in flat cap. Not that one, other one. No not that one either…”
The Yorkshire Pudding Burger
The invention of the Yorkshire Pudding Burger has to take the award for the most quintessentially Yorkshire thing to have ever happened in the world of food, putting a tyke spin on an American import.
Jeremy Ambrose is credited with the creation of this beastly sandwich, and God bless him for it. Combining two ancient Yorkshirian passions – destructively unhealthy eating and batter mix – most pubs around classic Yorkshire towns will do you a cracking deal on this particular snack with a beer included. Even Southerners have to admit it looks damn tasty. I am not taking no for an answer.
A camel went for a pint
No, it isn’t the start of a bad joke. In 2014, Tom Grant of Easingwold in North Yorkshire, was bought a camel for his 19th birthday. I know, it’s a little bit unorthadox for a 19th, but let’s run with it. The family started feeding the camel beer, after reading somewhere that camels had a taste for it, and it turns out that Jeffery (that’s the camel’s name, not their butler) couldn’t get enough of the stuff.
Apparently, the landlord from the local pub would bring the camel pints of beer up at feeding time, where it would drink with its friends, which were two pigs named Bangers and Mash (and no, I did not make their names up). Imagine seeing that in your local. Yorkshire: where even our exotic animals like their real ale.
Sean Bean’s pie obsession
Steak n’ Kidney, to be exact. Before jetting out to Asia to film a series of Sharpe, the Sheffield-born acting phenomenon (as they refer to him in the Steel City) apparently requested that the director ship him out a huge consignment of Yorkshire made pies to keep him going. If that isn’t one of the most Yorkshire things to ever happen, then I don’t know what is.
We don’t mind being roasted to death in an unrealistically warm climate, while we are fighting in tight-fitting colonial army uniforms, as long as we have a few Steak n’ Kidney pies for lunch.
The Pork Pie Appreciation Society
Speaking of pies, I can only type “is there anything more Yorkshire” so many times, but wow. The formulation of the Pork Pie Appreciation Club was a work of genius. Whoever you are, if you’re reading this, just know that the whole of Yorkshire salutes you. The fan-club has clearly being going a while, as the results of their 23rd Annual Pie Competitions are on their website. Said competition actually has two classes: traditional and artisan.
ARTISAN! I can’t actually believe I am reading this, but I am so glad I can share this with you. There is an annual Pie Meeting scheduled for May 2nd, and I am seriously considering attending.
Groundbreaking fish and chip research
Rightly or wrongly, Yorkshire isn’t exactly considered famous for its scientific discoveries. That may all be about to change however, as some researchers believe that the rise in sea temperatures could spell the end for battered cod and chips, due to the decline in certain fish species. In true Yorkshire form, action has been taken. If there’s one thing we take seriously, it’s our chippys.
A model has been developed that combines long-term fisheries datasets and climate level projections to help develop a way to halt the decline. As soon as the Saturday chippy is threatened, Yorkshire are straight on the science. When we do a job, we do it right.
Dickie Bird’s fair play
The last of Yorkshire’s many traits that I wish to chronicle is the unyielding respect of fair play, especially in cricket. There’s a famous story about Dickie Bird, the beloved umpire, who once caught a bowler attempting to slow down the over-rate (waste time, essentially) and Bird not only called him up on it, but declared his next five deliveries as no balls, irrelevant of if they actually were or not.
On top of this, the opposing team were given an extra run, much to the annoyance of some fans. Typical Yorkshireman: not taking any cheating or back-chat, and combating it with your own rule-breaking relish.