In this age of TripAdvisor and other such crowd-sourced review sites, we’re often bombarded with recommendations of the best places to eat, drink and be merry, and hotels are often under the scrutinising gaze of the general public.
But what about reviews of the guests themselves? What sort of people can you expect to be dealing with as you share an awkward lift ride up to the 14th floor of the Blackpool Hilton?
Thankfully a couple of hotel owners on Scotland’s Isle of Skye have submitted their own review of a recent guest – and let’s just say he’s a pretty big deal.
They’ve only gone and commented on The Greatest Living Rock Star, Kanye West.
Anne Gracie and Ken Gunn of the Skeabost House Hotel, described the rapper – who reportedly booked seven of the hotel’s room for he and his entrouage – as “the perfect guest – charming, courteous and polite.”
“We were delighted to offer him and his companions our usual Highland hospitality and would welcome him back any time.”
It is believed the star was staying on the island while shooting scenes for his new video for ‘Waves’.
But rock and roll and hotels have had an infamously tumultuous relationship in the past, and we’re guessing other hotel owners haven’t been so happy with the music stars they’ve had to host:
Hotel Delmonico, New York – 1964
“Those Beatles guys stayed here a couple of months ago (security was a real pain in the ass, screaming girls everywhere!), and that scrabbly looking character Bob Dylan kept hanging around their room. When we went to clear up the room, all we could smell was the distinct odour of grass. Turns out Dylan had been ‘introducing’ the Brits to some illegal delights, flaunting our no smoking protocol and leaving Ringo as high as the ceiling. Their music hasn’t sounded the same since!”
Ritz Carlton, Florida – 1984
“I’d heard to be wary when the Motley Crue tour with Ozzy Osbourne came to stay but sheesh I wasn’t prepared for this! We’d laid on a few extra maids to regularly change the sheets, but as soon as that tour bus rolled up it began to get weird. Osbourne fell out of the bus – obviously on some kind of chemical induced high – and immediately fell to his knees. I signalled for a first aider but before I knew it he was up and about again, ants falling from his mouth. Snorting ants. The man had been snorting ants.”
Holiday Inn, San Francisco – 1967
“Whenever anyone asks me who my favourite band are, I always used to say ‘Who!?’ and it would really confuse them. Not so funny now though; when Daltrey, Townshend and the guys barreled through our building a few weeks back, nothing could’ve prepared me for drummer Keith Moon’s antics. Usually so quiet and reserved, he blew up half the room (including the toilet; we’re still finding porcelain shrapnel now!) and plunged a Lincoln Continental into the pull. It’ll take ages to drain that!”
Edgewater Hotel, Seattle – 1969
“Our location on the pier over Elliott Bay has allowed our guests to fish from their rooms for years, but we might revise that. Those Led Zeppelin cats stayed in July, and both drummer John Bonham and manager Richard Cole really liked to ‘indulge’ in a favourite past time. They caught a large collection of sharks – at least two dozen – stuck coat hangers through the gills and then left them in the closet, which smelled bad enough. But some of the stories involving groupies and shark noses really do make the stomach turn!”
Main image: Getty